Hi, I’m Jonathan Nadlman,
At two weeks old I was adopted into a large intensely loving and chaotic family colored by and imbued with a full range of family dysfunction and damage including generational mental illness, depression, bi-polarity, rage and money addiction, acting out in the face of deep suffering and a bit of schizophrenia. We witnessed and battled firsthand the effects of drug abuse, infidelity, divorce, suicidality and chronic turmoil.
I found myself, way too early in life, forced to be a loving caretaker with a tendency toward pathological lying and a horrible temper. When managing everyone else’s needs, my frustration became my perpetual anxiety and it was all way too much. While exquisitely attuned to everyone else’s feelings, my own feelings and needs remained a complete mystery to me.
Although I didn’t recognize it as such at the time, one might refer to my experience as either “trial by fire” or early “on the job training” as the precursor for what would become my passion, my pursuit and my career. I discovered very early on the depth of my sensitivity and empathy which both inspired and encouraged the development of a complicated and sophisticated set of emotional management skills and defenses.
Not a unique story, but one that indeed determined my life’s path.
I managed to escape at age 18 to UCSD as a computer science major to secure my future and make my parents proud. But a year in a half into this pursuit, my anxiety was no better and I still couldn’t identify, much less understand most of my own feelings. Then one dark and desperate day, rather than sit for my computer programming midterm, I found myself hiding in the back of a lecture on abnormal psychology. For the first time up until that very point in my life, it was clear to me what I wanted my life’s path to be.
As a result I have spent my adult life unlearning my inherited shame and self doubt. I have since become intimately familiar with the internal landscape of soul and Self and how it is colored by trauma and contorted by loss and insecurity. I also understand the complexes we humans construct to avoid confronting the hard truths in and about ourselves. Playing too safe or small or too big and all the while being unable to feel okay or authentic and right sized.
As a clinical psychotherapist I aim to teach people how to recognize and then dismantle and correct the behaviors and personality constructs that no longer serve them. I combine compassion and humanity along with a multi-faceted, open hearted yet pragmatic approach to helping and guiding hundreds of clients discover and develop the necessary tools to stop destructive and painful patterns.
“Jonathan has helped me, and continues to help me strengthen and deepen the relationship I have with myself. A safe and loving exchange between the boy in me that I want to protect, and the adult that is better equipped to steer the ship.”
— Neil A.
“Question: How does one walk thru this life with dignity, grace and purpose holding a peaceful heart? How does a man balance the twin impulses of power and compassion (yin and yang) in a complicated ever changing society ?
For many years, Jonathan Nadlman has been my guidepost, friend and therapist on this ever expanding Adventure. Combining excellent therapeutic technique with esoteric knowledge and life experience…he has become an invaluable partner in my personal Journey…
The most difficult challenge in writing this is brevity…as I could fill a whole book with my admiration for this wonderful human being.”
— Jeramiah S.
"Jonathan Nadlman has helped guide me through emotional turmoil and trauma. He has served as a mentor by displaying a template of what it means to be at your edge and to have beautifully integrated masculinity."
— Teddy K.